Quotes

Here a collection of my favorite quotes:

Programming

For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.

H. L. Mencken

Programming can be fun, so can cryptography; however they should not be combined.

Kreitzberg and Shneiderman

Always code as if the person who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.

Unknown

Real computer scientists despise the idea of actual hardware. Hardware has limitations, software doesn't.

Anon

Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability.

Edsger W.Dijkstra

It's OK to figure out murder mysteries, but you shouldn't need to figure out code. You should be able to read it.

Steve McConnell

Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.

Brooks Law

Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand.

Martin Fowler

Optimism is an occupational hazard of programming: feedback is the treatment.

Kent Bent

Inside every large program, there is a small program trying to get out.

C.A.R. Hoare

Prolific programmers contribute to certain disaster.

Niklaus Wirth

The best way to get a project done faster is to start sooner.

Jim Highsmith

When someone says, "I want a programming language in which I need only say what I want done," give him a lollipop.

Alan Perlis

Martial Arts

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

Muhammad Ali

Victory is reserved for those who are willing to pay it's price.

Sun Tzu

Never fight an inanimate object.

P. J. O'Rourke

True refinement seeks simplicity.

Bruce Lee

That which does not kill us, must have missed us.

Miowara Tomoka

You might as well stand and fight because if you run, you will only die tired.

Vern Jocque

One man that has a mind and knows it, can always beat ten men who haven't and don't.

George Bernard Shaw

The ultimate aim of karate lies not in victory nor defeat, but in the perfection of the character of its participants.

Gichin Funakoshi

I'm glad I didn't have to fight in any war. I'm glad I didn't have to pick up a gun. I'm glad I didn't get killed or kill somebody. I hope my kids enjoy the same lack of manhood.

Tom Hanks

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.

Robin Williams

He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Never wear your best trousers when you go out to fight for freedom and truth.

Henrik Ibsen

Other

Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

Leonardo da Vinci

Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.

Jane Wagner

Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so.

Bertrand Russell

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."

Charles M. Schulz

You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.

Albert Einstein

As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life - so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls.

M. Cartmill

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

Philip K. Dick

Primary goal in life: Occasion to use the phrase: "Let me through - I'm a Computer Scientist!"

Andrew Moore

Get the facts, or the facts will get you. And when you get them, get them right, or they will get you wrong

Dr. Thomas Fuller

If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.

Quentin Crisp

To err is human, to blame the next guy even more so.

Unknown

If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day.

John A. Wheeler

Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional

Unknown

No one can have a higher opinion of him than I have, and I think he's a dirty little beast.

W. S. Gilbert

...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (1859 - 1930) (Sherlock Holmes)

Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence.

Robert Frost

Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

Unknown

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.

Unknown

Perhaps one day this too will be pleasant to remember.

Unknown

This life is a test. It is only a test. Had this been an actual life, you would have received further instructions as to what to do and where to go.

Unknown

Household tasks are easier and quicker when they are done by somebody else.

James Thorpe

Vacant minds must have their uses, yet it seems a pity to waste first-class bodies on them.

Unknown

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.

Mark Twain

After all is said and done, a lot more will be said than done.

Unknown

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't, either.

Dick Cavett

We're not lost. We're locationally challenged.

John M. Ford

Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn't seem to be working.

Unknown

If I only had a little humility, I'd be perfect.

Ted Turner

Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one.

Malcolm Forbes

The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.

Robert Frost

Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space.

Douglas Adams

A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with.

Tenessee Williams

You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun.

Al Capone

The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Robert Frost

Of those who say nothing, few are silent.

Thomas Neill

My little contribution to aphorisms

If you understand the problem then there is no problem.

I am indispensible - but everyone just ignores it.

Do not write what you want to say, write what your reader understands.

Everyone wants to be rich one day. I don't! I want to be rich every day!

According to the ads I have found my perfect partner for life: it is a chocolate bar with a strawberry-creme filling.

Thinking is fun ... sometimes.

Truth is like a big stone. If you stumble upon it unprepared, it hurts.

A wise man is, who can resist the temptation of the unspoken word.

It is the simple things in life that are important - a big car, a big house, lots of money, ...

Always expect the worst - most of the time you won't be disappointed.

Always enjoy success - the next disaster is just around the corner.

If you think something is simple then it is you.

"Democracy" is composed of two words. "Demos", which is greek for people and "crazy", which doesn't need any explanation.

Democracy is excellence in mediocrity.

Statistics says that married men life longer - poor bastards...

If someone is absolutely sure about something then he doesn't know what he is talking about.

Testing of software is a waste of time. Everybody knows that computers do not make mistakes.

There is a lot to say for religon...I just can't remember what.

People that trust in God shouldn't be trusted.

If you are not smart, you can be at least efficient.

What really scares me is that I am not scared about the things I should be scared about.

Build tools and the sky is the limit.

The purpose of life? Having as much fun as possible - but this turns out to be damn hard work.

Be skeptical!